Should there be a grandparenting 101 class? Is there even such a thing?

August 2024--If you thought it could be challenging to be a mom—just wait until you become a grandmother.

When my kids were younger I thought I was doing a pretty decent job keeping up with everything their pediatrician and well-respected authors recommended and frowned upon when it came to child development. As a new mom, I welcomed advice. And many times, even the unsolicited advice.

My kids are grown now and have kids of their own, which should have meant a smooth transfer from the joys of parenting to the joys of grandparenting. Right? Not always. Sometimes I felt like I needed a Grandparents 101 class.

When we put our babies down at night, we laid them on their stomach, covered them with a blanket and even had a pillow (or two or three) in the crib. And it was a crib chock full of stuffed animals neatly stacked along the bumper guards. (These last two sentences are enough to give today’s new mother a huge panic attack.)  Now, all that’s a big no, and so is putting the baby on his stomach unless it’s during the day for “Tummy Time.” Many of us didn’t know all that and if you’re not yet a grandparent you might not even know that now.

The car seats we used had a buckle at the center and and one at the bottom. Now, I swear there are 230 buckles and straps all to be strategically tethered. I didn’t realize I’d need a degree in engineering to figure it all out. Not too long ago I babysat for three of my grandchildren and had to pick up the two older ones from day camp. Before I knew it, I had exceeded the 15-minute mark trying to get the two-year-old into her car seat properly, I gave up and texted the neighbor. She ran right over and did it in 30 seconds. Of course she did—she has five young children. At that point I was happy I had gotten an early start so I wouldn’t be late with the pick-up.  A friend told me that once it took all four grandparents to get the little one into her car seat. Not to sound mean or anything, but that actually made me feel a little better.

Did you know car seats expire? I never knew that and didn't understand, but yes, expiration dates just like a can of soup. I learned parts of the car seat—from the straps to the bolts—can weaken over time. When I first heard about an expiration on a car seat, I thought no way. When I learned why—I was like, yes, way.

No one judged us when our kids played with metal wagons and Tonka Toys, or they burned their legs on metal slides or when they drank from a garden hose. Kids don’t play with anything metal anymore and a friend said while she was giving her grandson water from a garden hose his mom came out shaking her head in total disbelief and I'm sure some eyerolls, too.

When we visited our children’s grandparents we brought the kids, and maybe change of clothes. Now it’s like a U-Haul is needed to fit the Pack ‘n Play, portable highchair, bouncy seat, Bumbo, monitors, noise machines, clothes, bottles, diapers, and a cooler with organic food pouches and drinks. (I do have much of that, so mine don’t need to bring it all.)

But you know what? I’m thrilled to have kids who are willing to make the trip and I’d happily rent that U-Haul for them so as not to miss all those fabulous hugs and a day full of laughter.

Have some grandparenting tips you've learned or funny stories to share so the rest of us don't feel like we're the only ones who would have failed the class, scroll down past the photos to add your comments!

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